Lose Just a Single Piece
by Alma
Summary: What if Cloud had been lost before the final battle even began? Takes place right before the Northern Crater battle with Sephiroth. Our heroes are resting in Kalm Inn when...
1. Death

Sephiroth's shadow loomed over me and I was running in fear through a labyrinthine forest. I could feel him close behind me and hear his laughter as every turn I took led me back to him.

"You are weak, puppet," his lips curled in disgust and his Masamune cut through the air inches from my face.

I couldn't speak. All I could do was run. But wherever I ran, he would already be there, Masamune raised, ready to strike me down. I would turn again and run some more, but he was always a step ahead of me.

"You are a failure..." his words sliced through the tension in the air.

I was out of breath and my sides ached from running, but I had to go on, or he would catch me and kill me. I forced myself to go on running until my legs collapsed beneath me and my face hit the cool earth, sweat covering my face in the cold air.

I heard his footsteps, heavy and slow. I heard his laughter grow louder and louder and I turned weakly to face him. I wouldn't die in shame. I hadn't any strength left and he could tell.

"A puppet until the end. You cannot run from me. But you already knew that, didn't you?" He sneered at me and flicked his silver hair behind him before raising his Masamune again.

This time I couldn't run. I could barely breathe, and in the glitter of dim light that shimmered on his blade, I could see my reflection- I looked horrible- fearful, lost, afraid of death, a boy who had no control over anything that's happening to him. My spiky blond hair was limp and my shining Mako eyes reflected my fear as my worst nightmare was came to life.

He slashed down with the blade, cutting through my flesh and bone. I let out a silent scream in my final second. -

I sprang from my sleep, my entire body shaking from the nightmare. It was the same nightmare again that's been haunting me every night since Sephiroth's name was mentioned in my life again.

In the dark inn room, I could make out the others sleeping peacefully in their own beds- Barrett was snoring loudly, and the flame from Red's tale was flickering softly. Tifa was in the bed next to mine, smiling happily in her sleep. Yuffie was mumbling something and Cid had somehow managed to turn around in his sleep so his feet were on his pillow. Cait Sith was resting in the corner, next to Vincent who lay with a sad frown.

I noticed I had been crying and quickly wiped the tears away with the back of my hand. How many times had I had the same nightmare? And it always ends the same way... I couldn't possibly fall back asleep now. I didn't even want to go back to sleep for fear of that nightmare returning.

I rose from my bed, careful not to wake the others, and put on my gear and sword. Then I left the Kalm Inn quietly. The entire town was asleep, not a single light was on and the darkness was rather foreboding. But I walked on, out of the town, hoping to stay out until sunrise so I wouldn't have to go back to sleep tonight.

I walked along the plains until I began to near the never-sleeping city of Midgar. I stood at the entrance gate, not wanting to enter, not wanted to go back. What was I doing out here in the middle of the night anyway?

"Cloud." A chill voice whispered down my back. I turned swiftly. Nothing.

"Cloud!" Again my name... called by who?

"Hello?" I shouted, grasping the handle of my sword, looking around.

An enchantingly evil laugh erupted from the walls of the gate as the ground suddenly melted away. The entire plain began to move and shake and finally deteriorate into nothingness before my very eyes!

I stood in the center of a bright galaxy of stars! The city of Midgar crumbled away into the wind in the dead of night.

"What! Where...?" I could barely speak my own thoughts, when the chilly voice once more silenced me.

"Cloud!" It calls out...

I looked around and still saw no one.

Then a scene faded into focus.

It's... Zack! He's standing with me! No, wait... more of the scene is blurring into my vision. No ... Zack is on the floor bleeding. "Cloud." The words hardly escape his lips before his body goes limp. I hold back my own tears of rage as I pick up his buster sword...

The chilling voice cut through my memory.

"Cloud. You live in your past, haunted by your past! Your own nightmare is your life! And why do you continue to fight? You have no idea what worse nightmares await you in the Northern Crater!" The voice was horribly unsteady, shaking and trembling, the tone fluctuating rapidly.

Another scene faded into play. Oh no! Please not this one... Aeris, standing so perfectly atop an altar... I already know what's gonna happen... My body slowly walks up the stairs, not under my control.

A horrible feeling of possession takes over my mind and I can feel Sephiroth inside of my thoughts, controlling my body. I draw my sword and walk nearer to Aeris, still bent in prayer. She looks up and smiles. I smile back, but it is not my own smile. No, she won't forgive me! Does she know it isn't me controlling this all? I realize I will never be in control, and I weep inside... I want to curl up on the marble floor of the altar and let Sephiroth laugh above me, let me fade away, let me die! I would rather die than go through all that again!

"What do you want!" I suddenly yelled.

The unsteady laughter erupted around me once more, sending a chill down my spine.

"Cloud. A greater nightmare will occur, worse than any of these that you have been though. But I am merely trying to warn you...my friend...from here in hell..."

The wavering insane fluctuations steadied off and the voice suddenly became recognizable.

"Z...Zack?" I whispered into the darkness around me.

"Once you could've called me that. Zack was killed by ShinRa soldiers as you so vividly remember, hehehe."

Another scene popped into view.

"No. NO!" I shouted at Zack's voice, knowing all too well what I was about to see next.

The scene of Zack's death, that rainy night. We were almost in Midgar, but the ShinRa Soldiers had caught us. I was nearly unconscious and bleeding. But Zack had been surrounded and then shot like a dog. A death I cared not to witness again... I shut my eyes, refusing to acknowledge the memory.

"Please stop this, Zack. What do you want? Where am I?" I whispered now, staring away from the image of Zack's broken body, lying in the crimson grass.

"Alright. Cloud. I am here in hell, and I warn you, you will go through much worse thin...gs...w...orse...thing...s..s..."

Suddenly Zack's voice was intercepted by static and disappeared.

I stood alone in the starlight landscape watching Zack's death over and over.

"ZACK!" I yelled out, but to no answer.

What did he mean? What was he talking about? Warning for a greater nightmare than all this? He left me with so many questions! How was I supposed to get outta here!!

I'm just a lost soul. Trying to be tough, but I'm not. Trying and... I'm failing. That's all I was after all... A failure...

The moment I thought this, another scene flashed around me, like a projection I could walk through, but never change.

This time it was Hojo talking... telling me about the numbers... about how I was never given a number...about how I was a failure.

"STOP..." I shouted into the stars... "I don't need this!" but the scene kept dancing before my eyes.

I turned my face away and sat on the transparent floor while stars shot by above me.

I curled my legs up in front of me and crossed my arms over them. I put my head down and blocked out all the awful images.

"Stop...p..please.." I whispered to myself. Where had Zack gone, was this all just my imagination... is there no way out?

'A boy named Cloud might have existed in Tifa's memory, but you were never the real Cloud...' Sephiroth's cruel voice snarled in sinister explanation in my memory as a scene began to replay from my thoughts.

I didn't dare look up though. I curled up further and squeezed my eyes closed. I sat and listened as each tortuous scene took over the next and the next and the next.

Tifa's father dying, my own failure, Aeris dying, Zack dying, my mother dying, my town burning, EVERYTHING! ...everything...

I tried to block out the images, trying to comfort myself, but the pain was too great... it was all adding upon itself!

I was trapped in my own mind, tortured by my own thoughts... I couldn't take it any more!

I made up my mind quickly and in one swift motion, I stood up, unsheathed my sword and (with some difficulty) held it above my abdomen. With no final tears, and no regrets, I thrust my own weapon, stained with the blood of my own murders, deep into my stomach.

Warm liquid flowed from the deep gash. And I felt slippery intestines spill around me. I didn't look down, but my face hit the floor. I didn't even open my eyes, the blade still piercing my body. Sudden cool metal against my tear-stained cheeks, but I kept my eyes closed against the pain.

Each breath I took brought a surge of fresh pain and I felt the blood ripple out onto the floor. This was the most physical pain I had ever felt in my life as I lay dying on the floor. I could feel every beating of my heart straining to keep me alive.

I began coughing painfully, blood caught in my throat.

But I had no regrets, as much pain as I was in now as my heart beat it's last tremor, as my lung breathed it's last breath, I knew that as much physical pain I was in now, it was nothing compared to the pain in my heart... the pain that I could end now. ...

* * *

Eternal slumber, embrace me. This infinite nothingness will heal me. No worries, no nightmares, no past, no future, no present, nothing. Was this my heaven? Would I see Aeris in the Promised Land?

I drifted downward. The severe pain I felt several minutes ago had subsided and my vision had blacked out. I felt at peace for once... I was free. Free to float lazily downward, float wherever I wanted, like a feather.

Suddenly, I hit something hard, like concrete. Ow... My entire body weight pressed down into the floor. I awoke to the smell of rotting flesh.

No, I...I survived? NO! No... I was dead, I was sure of it. I opened my eyes. Was I in heaven? Where was I?

A gray cave... All around me. Gray... The smell of decaying animals was thick in the air. I pulled myself off the ground and began to walk.

The gray cave was moving... People! Thousands of people were here, looking drab and uncomfortable. Some of them yelled out in pain and others stood quietly crying.

No, this wasn't what I thought it was. I had escaped my hell...

I walked forward. Children's bodies lay near weeping mothers and father... the scene of death repeating itself, the mother yelling in desperate protest.

I walked onward...

A man nearby ran over to me, grasping my arm tightly, running from an unseen object. He spoke in gibberish and I backed up wordlessly. He looked at me in fear and yelled something out before running away, pointing behind him at nothing.

I saw the other people, laying on the floor, crying... I knew where this was.

This was hell... I had gone to hell, paying for all my deeds... my failures... Depression was sinking in as I walked onward.

I noticed a woman crying in the corner, long sobs that shuddered through my very soul. I approached her.

"What is it?" she said harshly, not looking over to me.

I stared, not exactly knowing what to say.

"What is it! Can't you leave me in peace!?" she screamed and turned around to look at me. Her hair was gray and stressed, and her face was worn with tear stained cheeks. She let out a gasp when she saw me. "Who... or what are you! You are still alive!"

"What? No, no that's impossible, I ...I killed myself. I'm sure of it..." I remembered the pain fresh in my mind.

She turned back around and said, "Look at yourself, you are not a spirit. You mind is dead, but apparently your body is not! You say you killed yourself? Maybe you only killed your mind. Ha. Mental suicide..."

I looked down at my appearance... I looked normal. I looked at the other damned souls around me. They were very translucent, like ghosts, and yet I was solid.

Just then I heard a familiar voice talk behind me.

"Cloud, so I see... you've made it to hell..."

I turned quickly to see Zack, inches from my face. I didn't even know he was there until he spoke!

"H... Hi Zack... Um, am I dead?" my voice shook.

"No... not quite. Despite your pathetic attempt of suicide, you are very much still alive. The planet still needs your body to protect it..." he said, walking along a path leading into darkness. I followed.

"Cloud, everyday I have to relive my own nightmares and fears in this...this hell! But..." he continued talking, with a smile of insanity..."But I'm not bitter about it... Strange how my communication means with you was severed by..."

"By what?" I stared at him in disbelief.

"By your own mind, Cloud. You were the one who blocked me out of your mind! But...But I guess that doesn't matter...nonono!" he stared back at me, giggling maniacally.

"Zack, what is wrong with you?" I backed up a step.

"What's wrong with ME, Cloud? HAHAHA! I've never felt happier in my life..." He smiled childishly.

I thought perhaps all these years in hell would drive anyone insane. Zack seemed very different from how I remembered him.

"Zack, how do I get out of hell to return to my world, if my body is not here..." I managed to say weakly.

"Well, your body just has to wake up!" he said it so simply.

"How am I supposed to wake my body up!?" I yelled at him. It seemed impossible.

"I don't know. Maybe you'll wake up eventually. Pray that you wake up... You stay here too long and you'll go MAD!" He spoke in unsteady tones.

Suddenly he jerked his head to the right and began to cry hysterically, "No! Cloud, my nightmares are starting again! I..I...No!"

He curled up on the ground and began crying and screaming, gazing at something I couldn't' see.

"Zack... ZACK!" I yelled, but he didn't respond, just kept his eyes fixed in one spot. I didn't know what he was seeing, but it scared the hell outta him and he sat there crying, not hearing me at all.

Scared, I wasn't sure what else to do but slowly walk away and find some small corner where no spirit was screaming and crying near.

I was trapped in hell...and nobody knew I was here... I had committed mental suicide, so my body was still alive, but my mind had gone to hell. I would've have believed it if I heard it, but it was painfully real.

I would've started crying myself, the place was so damn depressing, but I leaned over against a brick wall and tried to fall asleep the best I could... but the screams of the damned awoke me every hour. ...

Next: Chapter 2: Cloud's Corpse is Found... What will the others do without Cloud? From Tifa's POV...


	2. Pergatory

_Tifa's POV_

* * *

My eyes fluttered open to the silver of dawn creeping through the window. It was barely sunrise. Funny, I usually never wake up this early. 

I turned over to see who else was awake and then I noticed he was gone. His bed was empty,... but he always was the late sleeper. Cloud and I are usually the last ones to wake. But today...

Where was he? I guess maybe he couldn't sleep because he knew that today we would be facing Sephiroth- his hated archenemy. Anxiety and tension made my sleep difficult too.

Slowly rising to my feet, I put on my gear and went out to look for him. The others might complain if I woke them up this early.

Kalm was still asleep and the haunting glow of late night still hung around the shadows. He isn't here. A spark of fear and panic aroused and I felt something was horribly wrong.

Leaving the town, I walked out into the fields, fresh with morning dew. Meteor glared down at me from the twisted purple sky that surrounded it. But right now, I didn't care one bit about it. I needed to know if Cloud was ok...

Why would Cloud disappear like this? Facing Sephiroth would be hard for all of us, but running away was a bit extreme?

Then I saw someone lying down in the middle of the field.

"Cloud..." I sighed with relief and a bit of embarrassment for being so worried about him. I smiled to myself.

"Cloud, you made us all worry! Why did you leave like that-" I called to him, but as I neared his sullen body, I noticed he wasn't moving.

His eyes were closed, like he was sleeping.

I felt my heart drop and I ran over to him. He lay motionless on his back, facing upward and his face was pale.

My heart turned into lead as I felt his face with my hands. He was ice cold. A dead weight suddenly burdened itself on my soul and I felt my legs crumble beneath me.

I collapsed next to Cloud, tears bursting from my eyes and my chest began aching with a horrible pain.

"Cloud!" I sobbed, kissing his face and lips, hoping for anything than this.

But he didn't move and it felt like an iron hand as squeezing my lungs because my breaths came in short gasps of air as I let out long sobs of sorrow.

Cloud wasn't dead. He couldn't be dead! We had all come so far!

"No! This isn't fair!!" I yelled, hysterically crying, biting back against the choking feeling that made my throat hurt. I wept over him.

Everything was a blur of tears and I felt like I had been crushed... I felt I had died and I didn't care about anything else in the world suddenly. I could feel my own body weight weighing me down into the earth and my head felt heavy on top my spine.

I laid my head against his chest and cried into his blue shirt, weeping for him. I never got to tell him how much I love him, how much I need him next to me in battle...

Now, I didn't care if Meteor hits and everyone died...

I just lay with my head on his chest and closed my eyes, wishing he would wake up...just wishing it would be ok... Thud...thump...

I froze and I swore I just heard his heart beat. I popped opened my eyes and stared back at his face, a glimmer of hope arising.

His lips parted slightly. A struggled rasp of a breath escaped and his chest raised slightly and fell.

My eyes and heart leapt with joy and excitement!

"Cloud!" I jumped up and cradled his head in my arms, kissing all over his face. "Cloud!!"

He lay still. My joy evaporated. "Cloud...?" my voice cracked and the choking feeling came back again, worse.

Did I imagine it? Tears were frozen in my eyes and I stared at his cold still body, watching. Again, a slight raspy whisper of a breath departed and again he was still.

"Cloud..." his name suddenly felt foreign to me. I lifted up his upper body and hugged him tightly, my tears washing down into his face. "What's happened to you...?" I whispered and held him tighter, weeping.

"Tifa, where did you and Cloud go?" RedXIII asked calmly. I didn't even realize he was there until he spoke.

I tried to clear away my tears, but they came tumbling down the moment I tried to speak to him.

"Red..." was all I managed to say.

"What's wrong with Cloud? ...Is he dead?" Red asked in fear.

"I...I don't know... He's breathing, but he's ice cold... Cloud..." I broke off and hugged Cloud again. His face was wet with my tears.

"I'll get the others immediately!" Red announced and trotted back to Kalm.

I lay with his face close to mine for a few minutes and I thought back to the time when he had gotten severe Mako Poisoning from the events on the snowy mountain...when he handed the Black Materia over to Sephiroth. Poor guy...he couldn't stand or talk, but he managed to survive that so maybe...

"Tifa! I heard sumthin' wrong with Cloud!" Barrett ran over to me and he noticed I was kneeling next to Cloud's body.

"Oh my god! He's dead!" Yuffie began hysterically crying and hugged Vincent, hiding her face of tears.

Vincent stared down emotionlessly and his eyes ventured to mine.

"He's not...dead..." I sobbed, unable to let Cloud go. "He's breathing...slowly..."

"Ah damn! I take back all those mean things I said about him when he wasn't there before!" Cid kneeled down next to me and began checking for a pulse.

"He has a heartbeat..." I solemnly told Cid. He returned a grim frown.

"How...how'd he get like this?" Yuffie sobbed. "Was he in a fight?"

"There's no cuts or bruises on his body, no blood loss... It looks like he just fell asleep in this field and never woke up again..." Cid said grimly.

I couldn't even think about it without bursting into tears again.

"I...love...him!" my eyes welled up and my throat was dry. I closed my eyes and continued hugging him.

"Don't cry, Tifa! You'll make me cry!!" Yuffie mumbled through hysterics of tears and rushed over to him.

"I...I don't know what to say..." Barrett's eyes were sunken and misty and he turned away.

"He's not dead though! He's still alive. There's still some #!& hope!" Cid shouted to us.

"No there isn't. What do we do?!" I demanded, my sorrow turning to rage. "What do we do now that we don't have Cloud? Why bother fighting Sephiroth anyway? He's already won if Cloud's gone..."

"Cloud's not gone! And we can beat Sephiroth! I know we can!" Cid retorted and half-smiled cheerfully.

"How can you be so cheerful? One of our friends is in a coma - practically dead!!!" I screamed at him!

"How can any of you not be affected by this! I loved him! I care about him so much! I need him there with me! Why aren't any of you sad!! Cloud is almost dead and not even a tear for him!!" I shouted throwing my glare around at each of them.

"I...I cried for him..." Yuffie added timidly.

"I can't believe any of you!! How can we go on without him!! How can I go on!" I twisted around to glare at Yuffie, whose eyes widened. "We have to take him back to Kalm, back to somewhere safe! He could wake up at any minute!" my breath was hurried and I ushered the others to pick up Cloud.

"Where are we gonna put him?" Barrett asked sadly.

"...In Kalm! We'll rent out the room again! We have enough gil!" I yelled.

"He needs a doctor..." Cait Sith commented for the first time.

"Cid, you can fly to Mideel and pick up the doctor over there. He'll know what's wrong with Cloud! Hurry!" my rage was extinguished and I walked alongside Barrett, next to Cloud's limp form. "It's ok, Cloud, we'll get you help..."

"Tifa...you need to relax. We are all upset over Cloud, but he isn't dead or anything. We can only hope for the best. But please, Tifa, first you must calm down," Cid said to me.

My first reaction was to tell him that he had no idea how upset I was over Cloud and that nothing could possibly compare to the pain of seeing a loved one fall. But then I thought that maybe he was right.

I took a deep breath... "Ok, Cid...I'll...I'll try... It's just that..." I had to stop because again my eyes had clouded with tears once more.


	3. Cloud's Madness

_Cloud's POV_

* * *

Light combed its way under my eyelids and I felt like I was floating...drifting. Dimly, I opened my eyes and my head began to pound with a thousand knives and my vision blurred around me at the gray painting that held my sight. Screams of pain and sobs of sorrow shook through me, and the gray painting far off seemed to suddenly zoom into view and my vision cleared. Tormented faces and mangled bodies lay strewn around. And somehow the scene was comforting...

Was I always here? Where was this...my home...?How long had I been here? Days? Months? Then I remembered...this was my Hell... It wasn't all a dream. I was really stuck here. My foggy memory spewed some information to me on how I had gotten here and how I wasn't dead yet.

A man to the right of me was lying on the floor, his hand outstretched to me as he coughed up blood and moaned horribly. He called out to me and slumped over crying. I eyed him strangely and got up from my safe corner, venturing through the gray caves. How long has it been...?

I wanted to find Zack again. He was the only one down here that I knew. I needed to ask him how I could get back and other questions. Why weren't these people in the LifeStream? It didn't take me long to find him, he was wandering around with a euphoric grin on, laughing at the others.

"Zack!" I called to him and he turned, grinning at me.

"Cloud! You're still here? I'm sorry, friend, really I am. You should not still be here. The Planet still needs you to go fight Sephiroth I'm sure..." He shook his head, his eyes darting everywhere at once.

Sephiroth...?

Oh yeah, Sephiroth...

My memory blinked and I remembered a guy with long silver hair, a guy I feared. Why did I fear him again?

"You...don't remember Sephiroth? ...Cloud?" Zack lost his grin and stared at me in confusion.

"I...I know the name," I confessed. "Why don't I remember why I hated him?"

"You've only been here for a day and it's already getting to you? You do know what this place really is...right?" He questioned me.

"...Isn't this Hell?" I responded, stating the obvious.

"Yes, yes Hell, but it is so much more. It's designed for you to forget about your past life and only the single more terrifying event in your life or a nightmare gets replayed over and over and over like a real-time movie that you cannot change. You forget about where you come from, how you got here, your friends, your family, everything except the nightmare. This way you don't miss anyone and you cannot question anything because you have no knowledge of what was before all this..." Zack explained with a strange smile.

"But then how is it that you remember me and that you know all of this...?" I asked, wondering if it were true.

"I've had a glimpse of the LifeStream before it crumbled. I was there with the souls of the Ancients and I've held onto my memories-" he sighed thoughtfully.

"Before it crumbled?" I interrupted him.

"Yes, you didn't know that? The LifeStream got into contact with a stream of bodies infected with Jenova. It began to corrode and could no longer sustain the lives of so many people, so it shut itself up, saving the Ancient souls that rested in it and also saving the life energy of the planet. The souls that were NOT Cetras were forced out of the LifeStream in an attempt to save itself. And those souls ended up in this new plane of Hell..." he frowned in explanation.

"Which bodies infected with Jenova?...the bodies from the Reunion? The failed Jenova experiments attempted by Hojo...?" I squinted trying to remember it all.

"Yes, those. This place makes the souls forget about the LifeStream so they never miss it or their past lives. The souls are content with their torture because they don't know of anything better..." Zack smiled again.

"And you know all this because you were part of the original thread of LifeStream?" I ventured to guess.

"Precisely! The others that were originally part of LifeStream probably have forgotten! But I'm strong-minded and every night I think hard about it all and try to write it all down in the dirt. I try to remember every bit of my past so I never forget!" He smiled triumphantly like a child.

"But I'm not dead, why am I forgetting things so quickly?" I felt stupid asking so many questions.

"Your body is not dead, true. But your mind is very weak and the forces here are strong. Sorry to say it, friend, but you are weak like Sephiroth said," He shrugged.

"Weak?...What do I do to remember? Zack, how do I get back?" I begged him for a response.

"I...I'm sorry, Cloud. I'm just as helpless as you are. All I have left are my memories," he sighed and trailed off mumbling nonsense. "Remember when I told you that when we got to Midgar we would both be mercenaries? Remember, Cloud?" He nudged me in the side.

"Yeah...yeah I guess," I was depressed by this new thought that I would soon forget about everyone.

Zack then abruptly turned and walked off into the darkness.

"Wait! Zack! What do I do?" I yelled at him, but he was already gone.

This place was definitely more than strange. I stared at the sobbing souls, each reliving their own nightmare and I wondered which souls had been in the LifeStream before, like Zack.

I remembered what Zack had said. They forget so they don't know anything better than this Hell. They forget friends and family so they have nothing to miss...

Would that happen to me?

My heart sunk and I fell to the ground, very sad at the thought of it happening to me. I didn't want to forget my friends or anything, not even Sephiroth.

Zack had held onto his memories by thinking hard about them every second he had, but he said I was weak. That's all I was...all I am... a failure. I've been called weak and a failure so many times.

I sat in a pit of self-pity and depression and soon the Hell around me faded to black. All I could think about was myself and how I would be stuck here forever. And nobody knows I'm here.

I'm such a loser...such a failure, so weak, so useless... What's the point of me living anyway? Nobody will miss me when I'm gone...

"Your self-pit disgusts me!" a woman's harsh voice said to me.

I opened my eyes and saw a blonde woman peering down at me, a deep sorrow hidden behind her eyes.

"Wha...?" I whispered, disoriented.

She stared down at me and I recognized her face slowly.

"Mom...?" I whispered gently, the harsh lines in her face softened.

"Who are you...?" She scowled in disgust and suspicion. Her blonde hair was the same shade as mine.

"Mom! Mom, it's me, Cloud!" I stood up and my face brightened. "It's your son, Cloud!"

"Son...? Cloud? What kind of name is that? My son left me long ago and he burned the town, left me to die, consumed by flames..." she mumbled and cast a glare at me.

"No, Mom. It was Sephiroth who burned the town! It wasn't me! I couldn't save you, but I tried! Please, listen to me!" Tears sprang to my eyes because my own mother didn't recognize me.

"Sephiroth? Who's Sephiroth?" She asked me, her blue eyes a duller reflection of my own Mako filled pools.

Sephiroth... I could place a face with a name and an event with a name, but why did I hate him so much? Was it because he burned the town and killed my mother? No, I had to hate him for more than that...?

Again, my memory winked and I remember being in a Mako Reactor, in Mount Nibel. Tifa was kneeling near her dead father, clutching Sephiroth's Masamune left in her father's chest.

My memory twitched in a bright flash of light and I was still inside the Reactor. I remember feeling such a hatred, such an unstoppable rage for Sephiroth when his sword pierced my abdomen and he lifted me up with the blade.

I cringed in pain, but my rage ignited, fueling my Jenova cells and my strength heightened. I picked up Sephiroth and in a final ounce of strength threw him off the side of the Reactor into the LifeStream bubbling in the midst below it. Completely exhausted, I dropped to the floor and lost consciousness from the blood loss...

The memory snapped shut.

Sephiroth... Was that why I hated him...? No, there must be more to it...

I noticed my mother was walking away after I hadn't responded. "My poor son went away to be a SOLDIER..." she moaned.

"Wait Mom! I'm your son, Cloud!" I insisted, but she disappeared into the darkness, as Zack had. "Mom...it's me..."

I felt very alone and rejected. My mother didn't recognize me. Would I become like that if I were here long enough? Would I not even be able to recognize the people I love...?

Tifa...I loved her. Would I forget about her? Was I already beginning to forget? I remembered her name and face clearly. She was my childhood friend, I know.

I can still remember so much about her, about us... about our childhood growing up in Nibelheim.

It was the day Tifa's mother died.

Yes, I remember that day very clearly. She wanted to go across the Nibel Mountains, she thought maybe her mother had crossed them because her mother's a ghost.

The others went on without me...but I wanted to go with her.

The others turned back, but I went on only because I wanted to be with her, be her friend. I wanted her to like me.

And when we got to the bridge; it was an old creaky wooden bridge. And...

I struggled to remember in my mind. And... what? She fell... Did she fall? What had happened that made it so memorable?

Back then I could get by with only skinned knees.

Did I fall? Something about that bridge... What was it!!? I replayed the scene a thousand times, but each time I couldn't remember the bridge. I sort of remember Tifa's father yelling at me... What was it!

"Zack was right. It's happening to me..." I whispered in horror, concentrating on remembering what had happened at the bridge.

I could forget everything else, but the one person I never wanted to forget was Tifa. But it was already happening. What was causing this forgetfulness to the souls in this realm? I wasn't living a nightmare like the others were, but what if this WAS my nightmare- to forget about everyone I cared about and all my memories of friends and foes. Before, I didn't want to live with the pain of my past- I wanted to die. But if this Hell was like a second chance, I'd rather die again than forget about everyone while I was still living.

So maybe this was my nightmare-to forget Tifa... I shook my head.

I never wanted to forget the one person I truly love...


	4. Tifa's Sorrow

_Tifa's POV_

* * *

I held in the tears and sat next to Cloud who lay on the bed once we were in Kalm Inn. His face was still cold to the touch and his breathing was rare and shallow. I sat next to him, holding his hand, hoping for the best. 

Cid had indeed taken the Highwind to Mideel shortly afterward and Barret sat with me next to Cloud.

"He'll get better Tifa, don't worry," He sighed and put his hand on my shoulder.

I didn't say anything. I couldn't because I knew the moment I spoke about Cloud, I would burst into tears. I just looked into Cloud's pale face. I never wanted to leave his side.

"It's not your fault or anyone's. We'll get a doctor here soon and then we can find out what's wrong with him and how we can fix it..." He trailed off, but I still didn't look at him or say anything.

There was a great depression all around me and Barret's words seemed like far off noise. All I could see in my mind were Cloud's shiny blue eyes and his scarce yet radiant smile.

But when I looked at him now, all I saw was sorrow. He looked dead and if it weren't for the shallow breathing I would have been convinced he was a corpse.

"Cloud..." I breathed his name into the tense air.

I gently lifted my hand up to stroke his cheek and brush through his blond hair. His skin was so soft and his hair was like gold silk. I didn't care what else happened, as long as I could stay here with him...

Time seemed to fade away and the sun got lower and lower in the sky. Suddenly I looked up and noticed that Cid was standing right next to me.

"I found ya a doctor. The one from the clinic in Mideel is here..." Cid announced in a sad voice.

I heard some footsteps and the doctor walked in followed by the nurse.

"By goodness, what happened to this boy? Is he the same one who I treated for severe Mako poisoning?" The doctor wondered out-loud.

"Yeah, he's the one. We were resting here in this Inn and when we woke up he wasn't here. We found him passed out in the middle of the fields, hasn't woken up yet..." Cid cursed under his breath.

The doctor took a seat next to Cloud's bed and checked his heart rate and looked at him for a few moments, but I wasn't really paying attention to what was going on. I couldn't stop looking at Cloud's closed eyes and face.

"Hmm...this boy is malnourished. We'll need to start an IV on him to give him the nutrients and water he needs," the doctor stated as he and the nurse began an IV on him.

My poor Cloud...

"How did he get like this? Do you know what happened?" Cid asked the doctor.

Yuffie walked in, her hands clasped together tightly and her eyes watery. Barrett and Red followed her, each with a solemn look on their face.

"I don't know, doc. We found him passed out cold in the field. We were hoping you could tell us how it happened...?" Cid was looking very concerned for once.

"Is...is Cloud going to be ok?" Yuffie asked in a voice choked with tears.

"He's in a coma, no doubt about it. This is a bizarre case indeed. This poor kid must go through a lot of tough times..." the doctor sighed and shook his head. "I'll need to stay with him longer to try to figure out what's wrong..."

"Oh no! Poor Cloud! How will we fight Sephiroth without him?" Yuffie struggled to say this without crying.

This brought everyone into a dead silence. Sephiroth...

"We still need to fight him. We should've been on our way already," Barret mumbled softly.

"I'm not fighting Sephiroth with Cloud like this..." I whispered slowly.

"What? But Tifa we have to stop Sephiroth. What will happen to the Planet if we don't?" Barrett asked.

"Cloud was our best fighter. No one could ever top his Omnislash and he's the only one who can wield that sword..." I mumbled, feeling the tears rush to my eyes as I thought about him.

"Tifa? What the $&# are you talking about? We're all great fighters here. You alone have the most powerful punch with those fists of yours! Cloud was a damn good fighter, but not the best," Cid commented to me.

"Yeah. We can still take Sephiroth!" Barret managed a weak smile.

"No. I'm not leaving Cloud's side..." I frowned.

"Tifa. I know your upset. We all are, but we have to face Sephiroth. We have to defend the Planet. If we could work together as a team I know we could-" Red began to say.

"Don't give me that whole 'teamwork' crap," I interrupted Red. "Besides, what's the point. Even if we win, Cloud will still be like this..." I sighed.

"How do you know? What if his condition has something to do with Sephiroth?" Barret questioned me.

"I don't care about Sephiroth anymore! I don't care if Meteor hits and everyone dies. I DON'T CARE!" I shouted at them, then took a breath and saw their shocked faces. "Sorry..." I added, realizing I had been yelling.

"What's gotten into you, Tifa?..." Barret stepped back.

"Look outside. Meteor will continue falling and we are the only ones who can fight Sephiroth and possibly stop it. Remember how Aeris prayed to Holy? Our fight is not yet lost, not unless we give up." Red said wisely.

"I don't care about Aeris or Holy either. I can't leave Cloud... I'm sorry, I can't..." I said to them and turned away. "You don't know what it's like. I need him by my side in battle..."

"But Tifa... We need you to fight with us. We all have pain in our lives, but we need to fight for the Planet's sake. I'm scared. I'll admit it, I am. But I also feel protected by the fact that all my friend will be there with me," Red spoke gently.

"Not all our friend will be there. Cloud won't be there. And nothing will change my mind. I'm staying here and there's no way in hell I'm going to fight Sephiroth with Cloud in this condition. And don't even start will all that 'teamwork' garbage and how sticking together will save our lives. We've already lost..." I muttered.

"I've never seen you give up hope like this before," Barret looked at me strangely and his voice sounded very far off to me.

I turned my face and didn't say a word. Tears of anger and sorrow building up.

"What...do we do...?" Yuffie asked, a bit stunned by my words.

"We'll leave. Tifa don't want to cooperate with us," Barret said harshly.

"Where are we going...?" Yuffie asked again.

"We're gonna fight Sephiroth and save the damn Planet. We're gonna win and we're gonna stop him...without Tifa." Barret sounded sad.

"But...what about Cloud...?" Yuffie stared over at Cloud.

"We'll do this without him, I know we can...and I guess, without Tifa too. We can't just stop everything 'cause Cloud's this way... He'd want us to go on and defeat Sephiroth. We need to, it's our duty," Barret said in a noble voice.

"I'm with ya, pal." Cid nodded and lit a cigarette.

"Me, too. I am the brave Seto's son and I must save the Planet and make my Grandpa proud." Red held his head high.

"Yuffie, tell Cait Sith and Vincent we are headin' for the North Crater. Time to settle this..." Barret called to Yuffie, who went off to tell the others.

The doctor was speechless the whole time. I had forgotten he was there.

"Tifa...are you sure you don't want to fight with us?" Barrett leaned close to me, his eyes searching mine.

"Yeah, I'm sure...I'm staying," I said one last time and watched him leave.

Moments later, I heard the far off sound of the Highwind propelling through the sky. For a moment, I regretted my decision and longed to be in the air next to my friends, but when I looked back to Cloud, my decision stayed firm.

"Young lady, you must really love this guy. You were with him all the time while he had Mako poisoning and now your refusing your own friends to stay with him again..." The doc sounded disappointed, like I should have gone with them .

"It doesn't matter," my voice was hollow.

"...Listen, I'll be in the other room unpacking my things for my stay. Call me immediately if anything happens," the doctor explained as he and the nurse left to book a room at the Inn.

I frowned more and looked out the window at Meteor hurtling towards the Planet at a fantastic speed-the air around it was swimming in a dead purple color. But I was content right where I was.

My eyes trailed back down to Cloud and I grasped his hand tighter, letting out a long sigh.

Nothing would ever make me leave his side, nothing...

Unless he left me, unless he died...

I leaned over giving him a little kiss on the lips and whispered, "I'll never leave you, Cloud, unless you leave me."


	5. The Final Battle (3rd person POV)

_Note: This is in 3rd person Point of View and takes place during the final battle with Sephiroth's final form._

* * *

"This is it!" Barret yelled to the others, bracing himself. 

The pink and purple clouds began forming in a sickening spiral. They had been fighting in the North Crater for over two hours straight and now this was it. This was Sephiroth.

The One-Winged Angel floated down, his silver hair curling behind him in the wind. His eyes were a beautiful green that glared upon every member of the party.

His angelic body hovered in the air as the party prepared for battle. Sephiroth stared down at them and a slight smile rose.

"Where's Cloud and Tifa?" He pondered aloud with a satisfied and sarcastic grin.

"Shut the hell up!" Cid yelled up at Sephiroth. 

"We're gonna kick your ass!" Barret aimed his gun-arm at Sephiroth and began firing.

"Hahahahaha..." a cold laugh emitted from the floating creature. "Pathetic." Sephiroth slashed out with his bladed wing.

Yuffie narrowly dodged the attack and countered with one of her own.

"You bastard!" screamed Cid and the battle begun.

Sephiroth floated higher into the air and casted Wall on himself.

"Regen All!" Barret cast the materia and watched the bits of magick sparkle around each member.

Everyone's materia was spewing magick all around either protecting someone or attacking Sephiroth, who countered every attack with one of his own more powerful spells. The battle went on...

"Break..." A huge boulder appeared atop Cait Sith's head and crushed him flat into the floor.

"Cait!" Yuffie yelled, searching for a phoenix down, but finding none.

"Dammit! I'm too weak... don't worry about me..." Cait's toy body fizzled and went limp.

"Reeve..." Cid sighed and turned his attention back to Sephiroth and taking a slash in the chest. "Shit!" he fell back and fumbled for an X-Potion.

Vincent began to tremble and growl. Barret recognized his limit break. "Chaos..." Vincent's body contorted into a giant demon, spreading it's bat-like wings out around it. He flew towards Sephiroth, claws itching to rip through the flesh. Sephiroth was thrown down from the sudden attack, but he quickly got back up.

"Pale Horse..." Sephiroth uttered and Yuffie suddenly slumped over, barely breathing from the magickal slaughter. 

"Shit! Yuffie, hang in there!" Barret yelled, a red hot summon materia glittering in his gun-arm. "Knights of the Round!!" He roared, fading away as the mythical knights appeared.

The twelve knights attacked in perfect organization, each using their own distinct weapon and spells in their attempt to annihilate the one-winged angel. Then Arthur appeared, the 13th knight, and cut Sephiroth down with a devastating blow.

Cid, Barret, Red, Yuffie, and Vincent re-appeared as the summon ended. Sephiroth smiled, wiping blood from his lip, weakened.

"SuperNova..." the words were spoken and Sephiroth disappeared as the sky opened up to reveal millions of stars. One star seemed to grow brighter and brighter and Red realized it was moving...

"Holy shit!" Cid expressed his awe and fear, his cigarette dropped from his mouth.

The shooting star grew in size and shot past the Planet, seeping deep into the Sun itself, causing it to expand, terminating any planet that happened to be in it's way.

It neared the Planet quickly and appeared behind Sephiroth's majestic figure, raised high in the air. He smiled in satisfaction as the supernova burned through the row of heroes in front of him.

The sky tore open one last time, revealing the stars before snapping shut as the summon ended. The heroes were thrown off their feet from the blast.

Yuffie moaned weakly before collapsing in a heap.

"Yuffie! Don't die on us! ...Where's all of our Phoenix Downs?!" Red yelped in fear.

"No, Yuffie! Dammit! No!" Barret cursed and Cid's anger reaching it's breaking point. 

"Highwind," he snarled and performed his ultimate limit break, the Highwind helping him in the attack.

Vincent was still on the floor after the SuperNova attack, his limit break ended and his body growled before returning to normal. He searched his pockets, finding nothing but a hi-potion. Damn! No X-Potions? He quickly used the Hi-potion and hoped for the best.

Sephiroth's wall spell had worn off and Cid's attack did a nice deal of damage. Barret was nearing his limit...

Sephiroth was breathing hard now, his health wearing down. But he smiled again.

"Break..." he snarled.

"No, not again!" Cid moaned.

The huge boulder cracked right into Red's temple, and he stumbled under his broken leg from the attack, howling with pain.

"Damn, he's too strong..." Red growled weakly. 

Their potions and Phoenix Downs had been used in the first two battles and during all the battles in the entire North Crater... Damn! Barret frowned, barely alive from SuperNova.

He raised his fist to cast Phoenix, but groaned when he noticed his low magick power. No, he thought, they all couldn't die this way!

"Bahamut ZERO..." RedXIII shouted and fell away as the dragon appeared, circling and launching itself high into the atmosphere.

The dragon spread its double-wings, focusing all of its energy into a single ball of explosive magick and power.

With a powerful beam of light, the magick hurtled straight into Sephiroth, smashing him into the floor and leeching away his health. The summon faded and Red smiled in hopes of victory.

His smiled vanished as Sephiroth's bottom wings flapped weakly, raising back up the one-winged angel.

"Hahaha..." Blood trickled down Sephiroth's face, yet he smiled back at his few foes barely standing. He knew he had won. "SuperNova..." His lips curled into a smile, revealing his gleaming white teeth, before his form faded and the sky opened up.

"Oh shit! Not again!" Cid cursed at the top of his lungs, knowing too well this was his end. He would never fly into outer space again like he dreamed he would... And for a moment he thought of Shera.

"Dammit! Tifa...Cloud! We failed them! Goddamn!" Barret cried out sadly, knowing he was too weak to live through another SuperNova. He had let Tifa down, Biggs, Wedge, and Jessie down. They died for him, and he was powerless now.

Red watched as the shooting star appeared once more in the sky, knowing he was looking at death itself. He couldn't say a word except, "I'm sorry everyone..." he thought perhaps he'd get to see his Grandpa in the Promised Land after all.

Vincent's face remained emotionless, but he pictured Lucrecia's beautiful perfect face in his mind. His last thoughts were of her.

The sun expanded behind Sephiroth's almost defeated floating form, and an evil smile spread across his face. He had won- he knew it. 

The supernova flung each hero off their feet, their bodies dead before they hit the ground.

Sephiroth laughed again once the summon ended. All around him were the dead bodies of the pathetic fools who thought they could beat him - Yuffie, Cid, Vincent, Barret, Cait Sith, RedXIII... HA!

Then he noticed, one was not entirely dead...

Barret's crumpled broken body throbbed with pain and he dimly looked up to see Sephiroth peering down at him. Sephiroth raised his wing-blade slowly, then slashed down and ended Barret's life.

In the last moment, Barret wondered if the outcome would have been different if Tifa and Cloud would have been alongside them.

Sephiroth split Barret's body in two, watching the blood pool around his cadaver, and smiled...

* * *

_The moral is that you should always carry lots of x-potions, elixirs and ethers with you when you venture into the north crater! _


	6. Life

_Cloud's POV_

* * *

Was I already beginning to forget her? What did she look like? Her hair, her eyes, her lips...

I knew Tifa was the one I loved, but how could I not remember her face? My memory was empty, a black hole, void of all thoughts and pictures...

I sat with my back against a broken brick wall, struggling to remember her. No, I couldn't forget! Please...

Was I too weak? Was my mind too weak to withstand against this mysterious power that made one forget life?

And after this loss of memory...then what? When I was a creature with no past, what would become of me? Would I then relive a nightmare chosen from my fleeting memory to haunt me for evermore?

"Cloud... Is that you!" a voice called to me.

I turned slowly and saw a huge man standing near me, a gun-arm poised in place of a hand. I stood up immediately.

"Yes? I'm Cloud," I announced to the strange man.

"Damn Cloud, we'd thought we lost ya back there. You okay? Where's Tifa at? What is this place? I thought we was killed by Sephiroth? Where the hell are we?" The dark skinned man looked relieved by the confirmation of my name and sputtered out a thousand questions.

"I...I'm sorry, do I know you?" I was confused.

"You dumbass! Don't play around with me! We're in serious trouble 'cause Sephiroth ain't dead! I'm not sure what happened, but I'm so glad we found ya. Where's Tifa?" He asked looking around.

"Tifa...? You know Tifa? And Sephiroth? How do you know them..? We must have met before," I reasoned, staring blankly at the man with the gun-arm.

"Shut the hell up, Cloud! I'm serious! Stop playing around and get yo' spikey-ass over to Tifa and tell her where're back. How'd you wake up anyway? She was so worried about you, she wouldn't leave your side! I talked to her and couldn't convince her to leave you for just a damn minute! Damn man, where the hell is everyone else?" He began looking around yelling names of people.

Tifa was worried about me...? She wouldn't leave my side? This man must have known Tifa and must have died, that's why he's down here. His memory must still be intact... Should I know him?

Wait, did he say he talked to Tifa...?

"Did you tell Tifa that she has to wake me up! That's how I can get back! Then I can end all this and see her again! Tell me you told her to wake me up!" I yelled at him, almost hysterical.

"What the hell are you talking about? Why would she need to wake you up now that you're awake? And why the hell you acting so strange?" he demanded.

"Who are you?" I finally asked, the question not leaving my mind.

"Who AM I?? You better know who I am, Cloud! It's me, Barret! What's gotten into you?" Barret yelled back at me.

"I...I don't remember you. And you must not know what happened. You fought Sephiroth, right?" I asked him. I sort of remembered who Sephiroth was.

"Yeah, and we was kickin' his ass. But he summoned some sort of super comet that killed us all, I thought..." he looked puzzled. "We woulda won if you and Tifa had been there!"

"You're dead then. This is Hell. I'm sorry to be the one to welcome you. You'll start losing your memory like I have and then I've been told that you'll relive your worst nightmare. You will forget about your past life and be content with the torture here," I replied grimly, remembering vaguely the speech that Zack had once given to me.

His eyes widened, "You mean...I'm dead? And the others... Cid, Yuffie, Red, Vincent...are they dead too? Cloud... you're also dead?" He let out a slight cry.

"They are dead, but I am not. My body isn't dead, I've been told. And the only way I can return is if I wake up," I explained to this man who claimed to know me.

"Oh shit..." Barret sighed, sitting down. "I...I'm dead?" Apparently, some depression was sinking in.

I slowly walked away, leaving the stranger alone with his thoughts. If only he would've told Tifa to try and wake me up...

"Dammit!" I shouted in anger. "I'll be stuck in this hell forever!!" I yelled and punched my fist against the wall, causing a spider-web to crack through it. "That's it! I'm finding a goddamn way outta here!" I yelled to the sobbing souls and began running through the gray caves.

The caves were like a labyrinth, but I kept running, taking random turns and running until my breath was short and my head ached. It seemed like I had been running for hours, but when my legs collapsed beneath me, nothing looked different-nothing was changed. It was the same place! 

"Goddammit!" I screamed and pounded furiously against the wall, breaking little pieces apart until my fists streamed with blood.

I had to get out of here...

I lay on the cold granite floor, out of breath. My fists were coated in glossy blood and they ached so much I could barely move.

"Well, well, well, look who made it this far..." Zack's voice trailed through the air.

"Zack! I'm beginning to forget everything! A man with a gun-arm just saw me and claimed to have known me and Tifa! I have to get out of here, Zack! There MUST be a way!" I insisted, looking up at him and noticing he was standing right above me.

"Yeah, you certainly ran a long way from where you were before. I didn't expect to find you out here. You're near to the original LifeStream portal that led us all here," he smiled at the thought and began to walk away.

"Wait! Wait...what original Portal?" I grabbed his shoe so he couldn't leave.

"Oh, it's just the original link back to the main LifeStream. It's how the LifeStream put us all here to begin with. It sends us through the portal and our souls end up in this plane. I believe it's the way all the souls can get here now. They first must go through the LifeStream, then the LifeStream will flush it into this realm. See, I'm smart, I know all this stuff," he tapped his head and announced proudly, "I was part of the original souls of the LifeStream...you know, before the Jenova leaked into it and all." He frowned, maybe trying to remember it clearly.

"Ah..." I thought for a moment. "So could I get back into the main LifeStream through the portal?"

"I...I dunno," he shrugged. "Many have tried before, even me, and none have succeeded. What makes you think YOU can succeed?"

"Well, I mean, I'm not dead or anything, right? So technically, if I'm not dead it shouldn't reject me and throw me back here, right?" I thought it over carefully in my mind.

"Hmm...You could try it. But I'm stuck here for good. As long as I keep trying to remember everything, I'll be fine!" he grinned like a child and walked away into the darkness of the winding corridor.

I didn't think he'd be fine. In fact, I thought he had already gone mad, but I didn't say that to him.

"Wait! Where's this portal? Is it near?" I shouted, but he didn't respond. Damn...

I needed to get back to Tifa... I couldn't forget her. Even if I forgot that other man with the gun-arm it doesn't matter as long as Tifa stays in my mind, everything will be alright.

I continued walking, nursing my bloodied hands next to my stomach, wincing against the pain. At last, I neared a strange green light glowing up ahead.

I entered a large room with a hundred or so souls roaming around looking panicked and fearful. And on the far wall, was a giant green disc swirling with bubbles and green liquid taking up the whole sidewall.

The LifeStream- this must be the portal...

"LifeStream..." I thought aloud and my hopes began to grow.

I took a step near it and watched as it spat forth a soul, who landed in the cavern and woke up, puzzled on how he got there.

My heart was beating faster and faster as I neared it, sweat began forming on my face and I knew this was it. I stood next to the portal and taking a deep breath, I forced myself to walk through it. Suddenly, I was floating through the sweet green liquid. I was surprised to find that I was allowed through! I heard a calming voice enter my head. It must have been the voice of the Ancients or the Planet.

"Cloud Strife. You alone are allowed back into these waters because your death has not come about yet... You took your own life under your own free will before your time... So, why are you here?" the calming voice whispered through the bubbling LifeStream.

"I want to go back, please send me back!" I thought frantically.

"You were selfish and stubborn. You couldn't live with yourself, that's why you killed your own mind. Why would you want to return?"

"Because I don't wanna lose Tifa, I don't wanna lose the only person I truly love..."

"You are still needed to defend the planet. You alone possess the power to defeat the Planet's most dangerous opponent. You let your friends down by caving into yourself and being weak... They have died because of you..."

"Tifa has died...? I killed them?"

"Tifa remains alive although the others have been defeated by your foe."

"Please, let me return to her..."

"You are not dead, yet you are not alive. You wish to return to your body, but you will have to die again in order to do so."

"Die again?"

"The pain will be more severe than any other physical or emotional pain you have ever experienced before, let you be warned."

"Why do I have to go through more pain? I was told all I had to do was wake up my body."

"It is not as easy as waking up. Your mind left your body through pain and can only return through pain. It is a simple matter of life. One can only return through what it came through. Pain returns through pain. Life returns through death because it is from death that you left life."

"..."

"Do you wish to go through a second death and severe pain to return."

"I have no choice. I cannot lose her. I need her with me again."

"So be it."

I closed my eyes and instantly I felt like someone had stabbed me in the stomach ripping through my organs and spinal cord, an intense pain I had never felt before spread like wildfire through my veins. I choked and spat up blood into the pure waters. My lungs had been pierced and I gasped for a breath.

My insides felt like they were being incinerated and I twisted around, crying against the relentless pain. I put my hands in front of my face and gasped in horror, my arms were covered in thick dark red blood.

I screamed and screamed like I had never before, wishing only that the pain would stop, would yield. But it only continued more intense and my eyes flooded with blood, everything went black but the fire went on, ripping through my flesh.

I heard the sickening snap followed by a crippling pain as my ribs broke and my ribcage shattered into fragments. I felt the stabbing sensation suddenly cut into my jawbone and my screaming was halted as my throat was torn out.

Every fiber in my body was struggling to keep me alive, my heart was pumping uselessly as all my veins were split over. The pain scorched my hair, my face, my body, my flesh, my bone and everything was numb against this ripping sound as my limbs were torn apart.

Then I felt nothing. I couldn't talk or hear or see or feel anything.

Lazily, I opened my eyes, expecting an ounce of torturous pain to go shooting into my mind, but nothing happened. It was dark red all around me, billowing red clouds of my blood shifted through the LifeStream in deep contrast with the natural light green of the waters.

Then the red disappeared and I shot back out into my body.

I snapped open my eyes and sat up, grasping for breath, squinting against the sudden light. 


	7. Glimpse of Salvation

_Tifa's POV_

* * *

I sat, holding his hand, tenderly stroking his silky blond hair while he remained still, barely breathing. His skin was ice cold like it had been before. My poor Cloud...what torturous events are going through your mind?

I noticed sweat began beading all around his face and I felt something warm on my hand. Blood! I gasped and watched as the skin on his knuckles began breaking apart, bleeding rich red blood into my hand and pooling onto the wooden floor. His body stirred and suddenly he sprang up from the bed, ripping the IV from his arm, gasping for breath.

"Tifa!" he sputtered through gasps.

My heart leapt a mile and joy washed over every spindle of my soul! The depression flew off my spirit and my emotion was so much more than happiness!

"Cloud!" I shouted with enthusiasm, springing onto him, hugging him.

He embraced me, wrapping his arms securely around me. I hugged him close, tears of joy already down to my chin. I wished the moment would never end, I just wanted to hold him close and be with him forever.

"Cloud, I thought I would never see your smile again!" I cried.

He pulled me away for a moment, that scarce smile that I loved spread wide across his face. His shining blue eyes danced with a misty expression of pure happiness.

"Tifa...I...I thought I would forget your face forever!" He looked close to tears and his smile was eternal as his eyes searched mine.

Suddenly, he leaned forward and we kissed passionately. Every piece of me was relieved he was alright-he was here, alive, with me. I never wanted the kiss to end! I wanted to stop time and share that moment with him... I wanted to live forever. Then, we ended the beautiful kiss slowly. But I didn't care because he was with me, smiling.

"Cloud, I was so scared for you. I thought you were dead when I found you lying in the middle of the field," I wiped my tear-streaked cheeks.

"I was scared I would forget you, Tifa. I was in hell... It was a place where people forget their lives and their memories are washed clean. I was beginning to forget you. I was so scared, Tifa...I was so scared," He admitted, brushing back a strand of his blond hair, letting it fall again into his face.

He had never admitted ever before that he was scared about something.

"I-" Cloud began to say, but then the door pushed open.

"My goodness! You're awake!" the doctor exclaimed, rushing in.

Cloud didn't take his eyes off me though. "Yeah," he commented to the doctor.

"You sure recovered fast! What happened, boy? We couldn't figure out what was wrong with you!" the doctor was all too happy about Cloud's awakening.

"I..." He turned a bit red, as if embarrassed, "I killed myself..." he looked down.

"You what? Then how are you alive now?" The doctor and I asked at the same time.

"It's a long story...I...I don't know exactly how to explain it... But I got my memory back, that's for sure!" Cloud grinned right at me and we hugged again.

"Amazing!" the doctor was mumbling something off to himself.

"Cloud, I'm so happy! I wish the others could be here, but they left to fight Sephiroth on their own..." my voice got a bit sad.

"Fight Sephiroth? Oh no!" He suddenly cried, running over to the window.

Meteor was closer to the Planet than ever and the sky above had almost blackened around it. It was easily three times the size of Midgar!

"Damn!" Cloud swore and grabbed my hand. "I don't know how to say this, but I just remembered something that had happened before... Barret's dead. His soul is in the hell that I was in. I'm pretty sure the others are dead too, the way Barret told it. I remember he mentioned Sephiroth summoned a super comet that killed them all..." he casted his eyes down at the floor.

"Oh gods, Barret's dead? And the others- Cid, Yuffie, Red, Vincent?" I felt a new weight fall on me and I sank into the bed.

"Don't worry Tifa, we can stop Sephiroth. I know we can," He grasped my hand tightly and stared back out the window.

A knock at the door.

"Who's there?" we asked in unison.

The innkeeper opened the door. "I suggest you all evacuate. The meteor looks like it'll smash right into this side of the continent! Most people are leaving town!" The innkeeper shouted and went onto the next room.

"He's right, we have to get outta here," Cloud grabbed his Ultima Weapon and we fled from the Inn, the doctor not far behind us with the nurse.

The air outside of the inn was hot and Meteor looked as if it were directly on top of the town! People were packing bags and running straight out of town into the fields, away from Midgar and Kalm. It was a mass rush, but I stayed close next to Cloud.

Meteor was so close, I noticed the air was hot because of the electricity building on the surface of the giant rock. The wind was stirred up around.

"Cloud!" I yelled through the crowd. He turned. "What about Marlene?"

He bit his lip, "That's right. Let's get her quickly!"

We turned and rushed against the crowd, struggling to reach the house Marlene was in. We held hands and tugged through the traffic. Cloud kicked open the door where Elmyra and Marlene were staying.

"Marlene!" I shouted and ran up the stairs, while Cloud ran to Aeris's foster mother, Elmyra. "Marlene!" I found her in the bell-tower, staring out the window at Meteor.

"Tifa!" She cried and held up her arms to give me a hug.

"We need to get you and Elmyra out of here right now! Meteor might hit this town too! We've gotta go!!" I yelled and picked her up, rushing back down the stairs.

Cloud and Elmyra were already half out the door when I arrived with Marlene.

"Cloud!" Marlene exclaimed, giggling. "Elmyra was worried about you and Tifa!"

"That's nice, but right now we've got to get the hell out of here!" Cloud gave Marlene a big smile and took my hand again.

We ran from the town hand in hand with Marlene and Elmyra following us. The wind began to pick up into small funnels and the air grew hotter as Meteor closed in.

"Cloud! We're not gonna make it!" I shouted to him.

"Yes we are!" he insisted, shouting back through the screams of the people around us.

"Look!" Marlene stopped and pointed.

I saw a speck of green light shimmer off in the distance, and apparently everyone else saw it too. It looked like a sheet of green liquid.

"What's that?" I asked, turning my head towards the strange glow.

It neared from all directions, seeming to focus in on Midgar City. It was a swirling green bubbling liquid zooming in from underneath the Planet's surface.

"LifeStream..." Cloud commented quietly.

Everyone had stopped running to watch as the LifeStream whirled around the city. Right at that moment, Meteor impacted, crushing into the industrial beauty of Midgar.

The LifeStream spun up under Meteor in the last second...

And a blinding white light flared through the air, forcing me to shield my eyes against the catastrophe... 


	8. Alone

_Cloud's POV_

* * *

The white light blinded me and I put up my hand to cover my eyes. A revolting crunching sound suddenly cracked through the air. I opened my eyes, the blinding light gone, and everything seemed to move in slow motion.

Everyone stared at the cataclysmic event as Meteor smashed right through the LifeStream, pounding into the city, ripping it to shreds. The LifeStream had failed, Holy was useless, Aeris's prayer had died, because of the Black Materia. As Meteor made contact with the Planet, I heard an awful moan sounding through the earth- The Planet itself was crying out in pain!

Meteor exploded as it crunched into Midgar, sending a shockwave of heat and debris flying around for miles, right at us!

"Tifa!" I yelled through the noise, knowing she couldn't hear me.

She turned, her face distorted in horror as she realized this was the end.

"Cloud!" she called back, her soft lips quivering.

I could see my reflection in her misty eyes right before the shockwave hit us, throwing buildings and people every which way.

I was thrown down onto the ground and I fearfully watched the buildings collapse around me. The heat was exhausting and painful, scorching my lungs with each breath. Closing my eyes, I winced hearing screams of pain and sorrow.

"Tifa!" I screamed, hoping she was alright with every drop of my soul.

I opened my eyes and immediately stood after the noise and shock ended, gazing through the yellowish mist that clouded the town now. It was a sickening color, and I coughed so hard my lungs ached.

"Tifa!" I called again through the sick haze, coughing. I heard others coughing and crying around me. But I didn't care about them right now...

I noticed a small broken body lying at my feet. I bent down and cringed as I saw it was Marlene, curled up, her torso was torn in two by a portion of a roof that fell...

I looked away from Marlene's saddening figure and saw that the entire town was now littered with corpses and broken houses. Only a few people remained with minor or no injuries, me being one of them...

Everyone else was dead.

Then I saw her, lying still under a broken support from a building that crushed her. She had been pulled under it from the shockwave.

"NO!" I ran over and pulled her body from the wreckage. "No! This isn't real! This can't be happening! Tifa!" I held her in my arms, but her body fell limp.

I stared in disbelief and blood began trickling down her lips.

"Tifa! You can't die!! You can't be dead! I love you!" I confessed and hugged her tight. "I love you..." I whispered, sobbing terribly against this new pain.

It was worse than the pain I had felt when I killed myself, it was worse than when I had to die again in the LifeStream, it was worse than being impaled by Sephiroth's Masamune - it was so much worse...

"I came back for you...I went through all that pain for you... You can't just die on me," I whispered, but her eyes lay shut, her body lay still. "Please don't leave me here alone..." Hugging her cold body to mine, I felt the worse sensation of loneliness and sorrow swept through me.

"What did I do to deserve this?" I asked outloud, lying Tifa's corpse back on the ground. "What did I do!!!!??" I shouted, rage coursing its way though me.

I stood, unsheathing my Ultima Weapon and let out all my anger and frustration pounding into the ruins of a destroyed house. I screamed in a flurry of intense rage. "This is all HIS fault! This is all Sephiroth's fault!" If it weren't for him, Meteor would have never been summoned and Tifa would have never been hurt!

But if it weren't for me, he would have never gotten a hold of the Black Materia... That didn't matter, I argued in my head, HE'S the one who summoned it, and his destruction was the only thing on my mind!

I knelt next to Tifa's corpse for a moment and gently gave her a final kiss, stroking her beautiful dark brown hair.

She would never smile, laugh, cry...or get angry. She was gone.

Taking a final glance at her beautiful face, I wiped the renegade tears from my cheeks and picked up my Ultima Weapon once more, watching its pale glow illuminate the yellow dust that was now settling.

Then, I turned and rushed from the dead town, running as fast as I could. In the distance, Midgar wasn't even visible, crushed under the giant rock of Meteor. Everyone in the slums, everyone I had known was dead now...

"This is all his fault..." I cursed, rage spitting through each syllable.

But a sudden faint sound stopped me short. It was a muffled chirping, like the warbling sound of a chocobo. I paused, listening again, trying to decide where the sound was coming from. Then I heard it again.

I followed the warking sound and found the tattered remains of the Highwind, useless for flight now with its cracked hull. I tore through pieces of the ruined hull, as the warking got louder and louder.

I uncovered my gold chocobo, warking ferociously. Once it saw me, it began chirping cheerfully, trying to run over to reach me. It's a wonder the thing didn't die. The airship must have provided great protection for it.

"Wark?" It stared at me as I pulled debris out of its way, freeing it from the airship.

I patted the chocobo on its golden-feathered back, when I got an idea. I could take my gold chocobo to the North Crater and avenge my friends' deaths... and Tifa's death...

I would kill Sephiroth.

I swung my Ultima Weapon back into its sheath across my back and mounted the chocobo, grasping the reigns. I steered him out into the ocean and across to the snowy continent where the Northern Crater lay...


	9. An End to an Era

_Cloud's POV_

* * *

The journey wasn't far and I couldn't wait to cut through Sephiroth's face. I couldn't wait to make him pay for what he did...

Out into the snowy field, I dismounted the chocobo. "Wait here, I'll be right back," I promised it, once more unsheathing my sword.

I ventured into the crater, my sword glowing blue along the path. I shivered in the cold, but my mind was pre-occupied with my hatred for Sephiroth, now more than ever. I saw his face everywhere and I wanted to turn him into a bloody, lifeless corpse. He had to feel the pain that I had felt so many times.

"Sephiroth, you bastard! Where are you!?" I shouted as I ran down the spiral rock formation into the depths of the crater, cutting down any enemy instantly.

Finally I reached the end of the line and still Sephiroth was no where to be seen. The LifeStream lay in the pit of the crater, churning and bubbling peacefully.

"Sephiroth!" I screamed, "Show yourself!" I waved my Ultima Weapon through the air, bracing myself for an attack, trying to focus my anger.

I stood, waiting tensely, adrenaline pumping through me like blood.

The moment was thick. Suddenly, a swirl of purple and pink clouds spiraled in around me. I looked around, ready for his attack, waiting for the first strike. My breathing became heavy.

"Where are you!?" I screamed at the top of my lungs, my eyes burning red with rage. "I'll kill you, Sephiroth!!"

The sound of fluttering wings made me turn and there he was in all his glory. Sephiroth, a one-winged angel. Suddenly, a strange fear ran through my bones.

"Surprised to see me, Cloud? I took care of your pathetic friends," he grinned, focusing his green eyes on my blue ones.

"I'll kill you for killing Tifa and my friends..." I glared up at him, my arms firmly holding the weight of the Ultima Weapon.

But he didn't move, not even a bit. His cold stare returned mine. I hesitated foolishly in my sudden fear. In that moment of hesitation, he struck.

The blade of his wing snapped down into my face. I narrowly dodged it, the blade slicing into the edge of my cheek, cutting my lip. The hot copper taste of my own blood burned in my mouth. I checked my Materia and saw that I had none. Barret must have taken my Knights of the Round while I was dead... But I didn't need magick to defeat Sephiroth.

My anger ignited and I swung up into the air, my blade flashing again and again as I struck him down. I cut through him relentlessly, my adrenaline feeding my strength and all I could see was the color red. I sliced at him with my Ultima Weapon over and over, my muscles aching, but I didn't care. I couldn't stop striking him! After all he's caused, after all the pain he's dealt me, I HAD to punish him.

I couldn't stop myself if I wanted to. A blur of blood and blade fueled by my hatred for him. His face, his eyes, his hair, I hated every bit of him!

My muscles were exhausted from the attack and I was weakened. I fell to the ground completely out of breath and glanced up, every fiber of my muscles burning. Sephiroth was lying on his side, blood pooling around him, streaming down his forehead. He stumbled forward, then slumped over, not moving.

With a heavy sigh, I smiled, my victory so sweet. I wiped the blood running down my cheek with the back of my hand and finally my rage was satisfied. I looked down at the man I had once feared, the man who once could manipulate my Jenova and make me feel so weak, and I had won! For the first time, in a long time, I felt content, relieved now that he was gone.

The purple and pink mist of clouds faded away and I found myself standing at the center of the crater once more, next to the LifeStream.

Then I heard something, a voice. I had heard voices before, so this wasn't anything new, but this voice was laughing at me, like I was a joke! Paranoia grabbed hold of me, and I glanced all around, finally recognizing the voice. It was Sephiroth's cruel laugh, his arrogant laugh.

"You're dead!" I shouted in fear, "No, I'm just imagining this! I killed you!" I grasped my head, trying to make the horrible laughing stop! "Stop it!"

He's still alive...laughing...

Suddenly everything melted away and the crater chipped off into a sprawling starscape. No, I knew what this was... It was all in my head. He was in my head, and he would never die unless...

Sephiroth was standing in the center, exactly how I remembered him when we were once considered friends. He held his Masamune and narrowed his eyes at me.

I turned away and closed my eyes, "This is only my mind. I've seen this happen before when Zack was talking to me. It's only my mind, nothing is real here... You're not real. This is just my mind," I repeated to myself remembering when Zack talked to me before I killed myself. I shuddered.

I opened my eyes to see Sephiroth walking towards me, the Masamune glittering for my blood. No, this is just my mind. I already killed him.

"I'm very much real, Cloud," he spoke although his lips didn't move.

No, this was only my own memory. It's not real.

Growing impatient, he lurched forward, slicing down with his Masamune across my chest, splitting open my blue shirt, my blood running down the silver blade, glistening in the light.

I choked with the sudden pain. This was real, the blade was real, and he was real. He wasn't dead yet...

I stepped back, clutching my chest, watching the blood flow through my fingers. I looked up in shock, Sephiroth was next to me, the Masamune slicing upward, catching me again from my shoulder up across my right cheek.

I stumbled downward, blood stringing through the air from my face. I held my chest and shoulder, painfully, my blood covering the right half of my face.

Sephiroth smirked, enjoying my loss of blood. But I couldn't lose, not when I had already won before! The pain stung, but I unsheathed my Ultima Weapon, the handle slippery with my blood.

I went to attack him, but I was horribly slow and he moved out of the way, hitting me in the back with the hilt of his sword.

"You were so proud and confident," his voice sneered. "What happened?" he remarked sarcastically, although his lips didn't move.

"You're just a figment of my imagination. I killed you," I hissed, lying on the floor.

"Am I? Then why are you bleeding?" he raised an eyebrow and moved to strike me.

I threw up my weapon, just in time to block the attack that would have ended my life. Inches from my face, our weapons clashed, the sound almost harmonic.

"You killed Tifa..." I growled, his cold green eyes showing no empathy. "You killed Aeris. You killed my mother, Tifa's father, Barret, Cid, Yuffie, Red, Vincent, Marlene, and an entire city and town! You killed everyone I ever knew or cared for!" My voice twisted and didn't sound like my own. "You are the cause of all this suffering and pain! You did all of this! You summoned Meteor!" I shoved him away, pernicious rage colliding with sorrow. "Everything was ruined by you! You made my life a living hell! I can never forgive you for that!" I yelled, slashing at him.

I sliced through his hand, knocking his Masamune away from him, across the starry floor. I swiped downward all my rage and tension breaking down into the single swing of my weapon, colliding with his flesh, hitting him right in the heart, crunching through bone.

In his last second, he looked up at me and I actually saw fear in his shiny green eyes, so full of hate, not believing that I was the one to end his life. Then his eyes shut as I pulled my weapon stained with blood from his chest. He heaved over and blood flowed like a thick dark river.

I fell to the ground, relieved and dizzy from my blood loss. My chest, shoulder and cheek were split open from Sephiroth's attack, but in the end, it was I who was left standing.

Blood flowed freely from my open wounds and I was too weak to move. I put every ounce of my strength into that final attack. But now I was tired and dizzy. My body was weary. The important thing is that I killed Sephiroth...for good.

My hands were stained with Sephiroth's blood and my Ultima Weapon's pale glow couldn't even be seen under the coat of blood up to the hilt. I've killed him, I reassured myself, I've saved myself and the Planet... But Tifa was still dead and this hadn't resolved my sorrow.

I was breathing hard, blood still pouring out around me. Has Sephiroth ultimately killed me in the end? I was dying from his Masamune-inflicted wounds...

I sighed and closed my eyes, feeling a gentle peace rest upon me. The fight had taken everything from me. There was nothing left... I had nothing...

Would I return to Hell? To relive that nightmare? I didn't want to, but I suddenly realized I was dying...I had lost too much blood. The damage was absolute.

My eyes remained closed and a dead weight suddenly fell on me, abrupt and crushing, squeezing my breath out. At least I'd be with Tifa...


	10. Epilogue

_3rd Person POV_

* * *

Cloud's body slumped to the floor of the Northern Crater, blood pooling thickly around him from the deep slashes in his chest. With a shudder, the Northern Crater began to collapse in on itself, cracks snaking upward through the spiraling rock. The LifeStream did not surge upward towards his Jenova infested corpse. He was not welcome among the Ancients. The damage from Meteor had diverted every bit of the LifeStream, and now the Planet needed to heal.

But his death was not without requiem.

Everyone on the Planet suddenly heard a horrible cracking sound splice through the air followed by a long sad moan. The unearthly sob was coming from somewhere deep beneath the surface.

The Planet itself was mourning the loss of its greatest hero.

* * *

_T H E E N D_

Note: I greatly thank those who took time out to review my story, and apologize for the shortness of this epilogue. But I felt it needed to be very minimal. Let me know what you thought!


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